Some things are just for me.

I don't have a lot of free time, but the free time I do have usually hits around 10 p.m. By that time my husband has been in bed asleep for an hour "watching the game" and my teenage sons are behind closed doors on the internet, studying, I'm sure. It's the perfect time for an exhausted mom to kick back on the couch, in the dark, and turn on the big screen to watch whatever is on BRAVO TV.

BRAVO, for those of you who are wasting your time over on Fox or some other Spews Channel, is where it's at. It is the perfect mindless, ridiculous, almost "oh my goodness I can't believe they do this with cameras watching, what are their friends, opponents going to think when they see THIS season train wreck?" of a line-up that TV has ever had. I L O V E it.

Rachel Zoe, Josh and Madison and Chad, the housewives, Patti at the Millionaire Matchmaker. I love it. Plus Top Chef,whatever is on BRAVO, I'll watch it. Late at night.

Truthfully the main reason I got hooked on BRAVO is I don't really know how to work a remote that well. So if I'm lucky enough to find a channel with something I want to watch, I just have to leave it there, through the commercials and all. My remote problems have to do with a combination of fading eyesight (the buttons are so small), complicated systems, the fact I like to watch TV in the dark late at night (see above), but mostly because at that time of evening there are no men in the room. The men in my house have controlled the remotes for 25 years. I've never had a chance to learn how to use one. So BRAVO is where it's at for me. It's my one guilty TV pleasure, and it's the only thing I watch.

But the point of my post...personal assistants. On all these BRAVO shows everyone has a personal assistant. As a publicist I have worked with people who have personal assistants. I wrote letters to the editor for a genius of a man who basically invented computers and at one point was acting much like a personal assistant for he and his wife as they worked toward building an Eco-Village in the hills west of Boulder. I've wanted a personal assistant -- the right personal assistant -- for a long time.

I've probably written about my experience hiring people before. If not, I know I should, because I have some funny stories. People you hire always come with a cast of characters -- their family members, friends, parole officers.

I hired an assistant once who was great. For a week. Then all her "characters" started showing up. I had an office suite at the time, and she brought her 90 year old mom to work, put her in the corner, then proceeded to spend a few hours hooking up a TV for her mom to watch. There is much more, but she lasted a couple months. Maybe five weeks.

The next one was great and could do anything PLUS had great ideas. But she wasn't available during the day. I felt guilty because she had to spend all sorts of money to upgrade her computer just to get EMAIL, and she was not nearly as computer literate as I would have liked. She also could only work for me at night or on weekends, and if there's any time I hate to work it's at night and on the weekends. She always wanted to come on Saturdays. By Saturday afternoon I've been to a 5 a.m. hockey practice, maybe a game, played tennis, and I'm ready for a nap, not work. Anyway, that didn't work.

Then there was the friend who closed his business and then told me he was going to work with me and create a position for himself. I said, Great, bring it on, but after one day in my office I think he realized it wasn't for him. Anyway, that didn't work.

Then there's Jess. I've known her for a while because she worked where I get my mail. She had taken a couple other part time assistant things around the lake, and it was working for her. She had time for a few hours a week for me, so I grabbed her. She's working out great. She's coming today. When she is here, things get done. Important things. She gets the job sheets filled out or (as in today) off the floor and organized and filed and prioritized by deadline. She gets all my work up on the white board. She will go through all the college materials and get deadlines together for my son's college apps. She will order me football tickets if I want her to.

Since I'm a writer, I can't write when someone else is in my office. Or I prefer not to, so Jess comes on the days when I'm calling clients and doing research or interviews or pitching. When I'm on the phone, she's master of my domain and gets things organized, filed and put away. She only stays a few hours, and when she's gone, I get back to writing.

The more she's around the more I realize how much I can get done with help. ORGANIZATIONAL help. I have design help and business partners and lots of people I share work with who HELP me. But they are doing work for my clients. The personal assistant seems the most valuable to ME though. At the risk of sounding selfish. She's MINE. I don't want her working for my clients. She works for me. My work involves a business and a family and how the two co-exist. If she was available more, I'd have her handling my son's party tomorrow too. Those things are part of MY job. A personal assistant CAN help with that stuff. There's lots to be done. Take this party...

Tomorrow is Halloween and my 14 year old son guilted me into letting him have some friends over because "there isn't anything for kids like us to do but get in trouble." So he's having some teens over "NOT for a Halloween party," but just for a party party.

Parties throw the household into a tizz and are somewhat outside the domain of a personal assistant. For this, I really need a housekeeper. Like Zoila: Jeff's housekeeper on Flipping Out. Love that show. Yes. I need a Zoila. She could clean the crust out of my son's bathroom sink and clean my house so it sparkles. She could go to the market and buy the stuff for the frito pie for the party, and make sure there's enough soda and candy and all that Halloween not Halloween stuff.

Yep. That would be nice. But for now I'll live vicariously through the people on BRAVO TV. I'll cherish the few hours I have with my own personal assistant. And if I'm really, REALLY lucky, my new assistant will teach me how to use the remote.

Please Give Generously to the American Cancer Society

My sister-in-law Nancy Shaw, shown here with my two sons and her husband Jim, recently lost her 4-year battle with brain cancer. Cancer takes far too many far too young. I encourage everyone to give generously to the American Cancer Society so that wonderful, loving people like Nancy can live long, healthy lives.

In Memory of Nancy Kay Holubar Shaw, May 1, 1954 - October 17, 2009