Happy New Year

It's always nice when you can end the year on a positive note. There have been some years when I couldn't wait to close the door on one year and move to a new one. Thankfully, this isn't one of them. 2007 was pretty good overall. It feels good to be able to say that.

In 2007, we moved, which can be a really good thing. It gives you a chance to purge yourself of "stuff" that you really don't need. It feels good to get rid of clutter and start fresh.

In 2007 I had a chance to visit with just about everyone I'm related to -- in person. That's pretty unusual and it was really, really nice. The occasion was my grandmother's 95th birthday celebration -- a week spent on Lake Maxincuckee in Northern Indiana. I know how very lucky I am to still have my grandmother. So many people my age do not have any grandparents left. It's amazing how smart the elderly are. After all, they have lived far, far longer than the rest of us. If you take the time to listen to them you can learn a whole awful lot.

In 2007 my youngest son became a teenager and for the first time in years I found myself with kids that really truly could take care of themselves. That made my business trips easier and my weekends more enjoyable. I no longer dreaded Friday nights as the start of a long weekend of "taking care of kids." Now I just drive kids, and feed kids, and pay for things. It's easier, and as I get older and my patience wanes, it's nice to have more time to myself. I think that's good for everyone around me.

2007 was a year when gas prices went through the roof and I started thinking more seriously before every trip I took -- whether it was just to town or to some far-flung locale. I don't want to think of the thousands of dollars that went into my gas tank, and it is a little annoying to hear my oil business friends talking of their tremendous profits. (Their new homes, the cars their kids drive, and the vacations they take tell those stories easily enough.)

But other than the gas prices (and the cost of milk and groceries in general), this was a pretty good year. And I'm hopeful that 2008 will be even better. Maybe the economy will continue to improve and gas won't seem so unpalatable.

So here's wishing everyone a fantastic 2008 and one of the best years ever. Happy New Year!

Holiday-isms

I have two sons, so for most of their lives I've handled any and all shopping requirements (other than when they've had birthday money to spend or some other "special" occasion). So the other day as my oldest (now 15) and I were leaving Wal-Mart after a quick trip for essentials and a couple small presents, I asked him if he wanted to give his dad something I had bought.

"No, Mom. Giving someone something someone else bought is like putting your name on somebody else's homework. You just don't do it." I thought that was a great analogy, and I'm glad to know he's finally growing up.

When he's going shopping and what he'll get his dad instead remains to be seen. But I'm glad I don't have to worry about that. (We'll see...)

Deck the halls...

I just came from church, and at the risk of alienating someone, I wanted to share something here.

Jesus is the reason for the season.

I probably should end this post right now, but because I’m a writer and this is my blog, I won’t.

Here are a few random thoughts. Feel free to add your own in a reply to this post. I really think Christmas has gotten to the point where it has to be nearly unaffordable for a whole lot of people. We’re bombarded by TV ads showing perfect, beautiful people who are exceedingly joyful in their holiday cashmere sweater. We think we need cashmere or diamonds or SALES to make us happy and to ‘bring in the holiday season.’

You saw them on TV on Black Friday (or sadly a lot of you – us—did do at least some shopping that day). I know from a close relative who does get up at 4 a.m., that to get the things that they feel everyone else has at a price they can afford, they have to get up and go to the store at 4 a.m. I think that’s pretty sad. On a whole lot of levels.

Spending money can make you happy. I’ve been there, done that, have the shoes, purses, dishes, knick knacks and collectibles to prove it. But the spending happy high goes away, and the stuff (unless, of course it’s something really special) never quite delivers what the TV ads promised or what we thought we were getting. It’s all just stuff.

The Circle of Life

Last Wednesday night I had one of those experiences that somehow changed my life. Or if it didn't change it, it made me look at it and appreciate it in a very different way.

I went to Denver Wed. to meet a client and visit some friends. While there I also drove past the first house I ever owned. That was an interesting experience. The fence was falling down, and everything seemed really, really small. But it had been our first house back in 1986. At the time, I loved it. Today I wanted to get out of that neighborhood before it got dark. Funny how life changes your perspective a bit. Anyway, that's not the point of this post....

I had arranged to spend the night in Denver at the home of my incredibly beautiful and wonderful friend. We had worked together back in the 80s and early 90s, had lost touch a bit during our "young baby and little kid" years, particularly after I moved to Boulder and later Texas. We did the Christmas card thing for a while, but neither of us is great at that. We both tend to slack off on the contact when things are going bad, and between the two of us we've dealt with our share of cancer, death, bad marriages, the ups and downs of self employment, and divorce. But Jill's one of those kind of friends that you pick up with right where you left off. There is no pretense. It's an honest, caring relationship. Anyway, that's also not the story I want to share either.

What was so incredible about this particular visit, and what I felt was another one of those "rights of passage" that I'm having more and more as I get older, was listening to Jill's 14-year old daughter play the guitar and sing. This young girl is a very talented human being. It was so weird to realize that she had been created by my friend. So weird to realize that, back when we were running around together in our 20s we never could have imagined this young lady or the talent that she has. She sang, or really performed, not like a 14-year old kid, but like a famous artist. Her confidence was engaging, and her voice and skillful use of the guitar delivered a soulful performance full of emotion and, dare I say, angst.

Now this daughter of my friend has some reason for angst, I suppose. Her parents have been through a bitter divorce that continues, despite their best efforts, as a contentious ongoing relationship. My friend says her daughter pours her emotion into her guitar. It was obvious. Beautiful and sad all at once.

When marriages end, there are different outcomes for different situations. The sadness about this marriage ending was that it was a relationship full of love. I distinctly remember my friend being absolutely gaga in love with her husband, who was one of the best looking young guys I'd ever seen at the time. The two of them L-O-V-E-D each other. That love evolved into a family with two gorgeous little girls and more than its share of love. We're talking tons of love. Problems, sure. But love, no doubt. That's what makes it all so sad. That marriage carried a lot of hope and patience, relationship counseling and understanding, but then finally efforts were exhausted, there was a relational explosion, followed by implosion and eventually disintegration.
It's all really powerful material for an artist. And Jill's daughter is the benefactor. This young lady has talent and focus and drive and commitment, and she will be a major star. She is a young Jewel, carrying the pain of her experiences. From the outside looking in, you wouldn't expect so much pain in an upper middle class neighborhood and a house on a cul-de-sac. But it's been there, despite everyone's best efforts.

In this case, the pain has been transformed in different ways. For one little girl it's been transformed into musical talent. It seems like a healthy repository.

Last week I realized by looking in on this family that our lives and the decisions we make day to day really do have meaning. Even if what we're doing at a particular moment seems like it won't have an impact somewhere, everything we do impacts something else.

My friend has a beautiful daughter who just might be a famous singer. It's a result of the decisions and actions that her parents have made -- from buying her a guitar to divorcing. Everything has an impact.

I'm not sure if this young lady would sing with such emotion or talent if she hadn't experienced so much in her young life. It makes me realize that the decisions we make on a daily basis make a difference to more than just us. I have kids, and this has me thinking.

We're all participating in the circle of life. Everything we do has a consequence. Making the best of every situation is our obligation.

Who's to say that this young lady wouldn't be singing with the same emotion if her mom and dad were still married and things were "easier." She may have been just as talented and just as dedicated to her guitar. But maybe not.

I'm looking at every decision I make differently now. I'm watching my own kids a little closer now. And I'm appreciating this circle of life for all it's goods and bads. Life is important. Everything we do today impacts the future. That is the circle of life.

Just another day in the office

I meet a lot of people, and people always say, "Oh, you're a writer, that's interesting. What do you write." When I tell them, or usually when I start to tell them, their eyes tend to gloss over and they quickly lose interest. It's not that my clients aren't interesting, but if you say a writer people expect you to be a more interesting person. I guess.

But I like what I do and I do what I like. Sounds like a Jimmy Buffet song or a Dr. Seuss book, but thankfully, it's my life.

I'm starting to realize that I'm pretty lucky like that. I get to work on things I find interesting and help people improve their business and make money. That's pretty satisfying work. It may not make for interesting cocktail chatter or keep someone from zoning out, but it does keep the lights at my house on and keeps the kids fed. There's a whole lot to be said for that.

Writing isn't very exciting though. If you've ever tried to watch someone write, it's boring. In fact, people (well, my family members and patrons at some of the public wifi spots I visit) are always coming up behind me when I'm writing and they start talking to me, perhaps because they don't see me doing anything. At least I look like I'm not doing anything because I'm staring at the screen, reading, maybe thinking, maybe typing, but not necessarily doing anything active.

These same people have been a little slow to learn that they can come upon me like that and talk to me, even complete entire conversations on their end, and I won't hear a word they've said. Sometimes I don't even know they were there. I usually have a sense that something happened that I missed, but not always. My point is that writing is not a spectator sport, and even if someone looks like they aren't doing anything, if they are a writer, they are working -- sometimes in a faraway place on the right side of their creative brain.

People who come over to my office or who "drop by because they were in the neighborhood" usually find me looking like I'm not working. I guess since a lot of people use their computers and the internet primarily for entertainment, they see me in front of mine and assume I'm on ebay or something.

"What are you doing?" "Writing this release (or story or web page)." "Oh," they say. "I'll just wait." But they never wait quietly. They see I'm not doing anything, or I don't look like I"m doing anything, or I'm just typing something up...so they start talking. I can't work when someone is talking to me, which also explains why (my clients have learned) I don't like to talk on the phone much during the day -- during my productive writing time.

As a writer, I'm never done and never off work. I've got lots of stuff going on all the time -- ideally a dozen clients who are relying on me to help them do something cool with their business. I also have a screenplay and 12 episodes of a sitcom to write, two web businesses I want to create, and I need to do my billing.

I choose not to work sometimes, quite often in fact, but I'm never DONE with my work. Which doesn't mean I don't know when to quit. I know when things aren't going anywhere or when I'm just wasting time, or when I'm avoiding real work I should be doing. Like now. So when I'm rambling, or things aren't gelling, it's time to get off work and do something else -- laundry or exercise or a phone call -- or in the case of me sitting here writing this blog, it's time for me to get to work, make some phone calls, do some billing.

One way or another, I'll crank out some copy today or write a funny scene or name some new product something cool. I'll put out a news release and pitch a story. I'll prepare a report, send some billing, call a client. It's another day in the office. Just a regular day. Cuz I'm a writer, and it's not that exciting. I don't burn a lot of calories doing it. And my hands and eyes get a little sore. But other than that, it's just a regular day in the office doing what I do for people I like. I have no complaints. I'm lucky like that. I hope you are too.

Perfection

The older I get the less I care about being perfect.

Now that doesn't apply to typos. I still cringe at the thought of typos and bad grammar, so I'm a stickler for that. But otherwise I'm now old enough to readily admit that I make mistakes. I miss the boat. I sometimes really screw up. Not often, but sometimes.

I used to sweat it when I messed up. "Oh, man, I'm a consultant with a lot of experience and I should have known better." But the reality is that in my business there really is no right or wrong "for sure" answer. Every situation deserves individualized evaluation to ensure that the right path is taken. Most times we figure it out. Sometimes we don't.

Most of the time when things go awry it's because we didn't take the time to think everything through early on. It's that think time that, more often than not, makes the difference between a successful and wildly successful campaign.

Dialing in that precious think time can be hard. In my business it involves research (of media, competitive products, industry leaders), conversations, and then just "think time." Sometimes it's easy, like when I pray about it and the answers just come -- divinely. Sometimes it's hard. But when the time is taken, it helps -- a lot.

Now I'm also not perfect in my personal life. I lose my temper, I say things without thinking them through first, I raise my voice and sometimes slam doors. I'm a bit moody and sometimes demanding. My highs are high and my lows are ...scary. Medication would probably be recommended, but I take pride in not using drugs to alter my moods. Meditation instead of medication is my mantra. It works when I use it.

So it's interesting to write this, sort of stream of consciousness and then realize that the two best tactics I've listed here for getting ideas and improving mood involve similar activities -- praying and meditating. Both can provide the same result -- clarity on the path of action we need to take.

Interesting. Something to think about.

Self Promo Phobia, i.e. Help Wanted

The whole reason a job like mine exists is because people want and need promotion and they don't want to do it themselves.

And that is the subject of this post. I am looking for a publicist to promote my business. What do I do? I'm a publicist. It sounds pretty stupid, but at the same time I think it validates what I do. I recognize that I need a professional -- someone other than myself -- to promote me.

Now please don't get me wrong. I'm not an ego-maniac. I don't crave the spotlight or need attention to feel self worth. It's about business. It's about making sure that people who might want to hire a publicist (because they need self promotion or business promotion or product promotion) feel good about hiring me because I'm noted somewhere somehow as being a good publicist.

A good publicist will make you do things you wouldn't do on your own. They'll force you to go to places you don't want to go and smile like you want to be there and say just the right things, because they'll do their homework and know who's there and know what they want to hear and tell you all the right things to say. A good publicist handles everything so you don't have to. That's what I want.

It only gets weird if you think about it too hard (and I obviously have), in that I want to have this publicist tell somebody somewhere that I'm a really good publicist. It's not that I couldn't do it myself, it's just that I don't find that sort of work all that interesting.

So, if you know of a good publicist (not some hack or wanna be, but someone with real clients and real experience), let me know. I need someone forceful enough to boss me around yet diplomatic enough that I don't realize it. I'm not cheap, but I want value. I expect results -- I'm not sure what kind or why, but I expect them. I need someone who makes me a priority like I make my clients priorities.

That's what I need -- soon! I've been putting this off far too long. Applicants can respond to this blog with their qualifications. Please no more than 50 words, and if you don't know how to blog, this is your chance to learn. No whiners. I'm a stickler for perfection, but by no means am I perfect, that's why I need you. No typos, don't pester me, we'll talk dress code if needed, but just get me results. I'll be relying on you for ink -- lots of it, and interviews with editors and writers. Yes, I'll get a new headshot, and yes I'm willing to travel or spend a little money for some design or conferences or whatever...but just don't try to suck me dry. I know your business and I'll have my eyes peeled.

There. It feels great to be taking this off my plate. Well worth every dime. (And I know you're out there.) Good luck. May the best candidate win!